How I learnt to mind my own business

Many of us come across situations which make us feel dumb. When an autowala did not ask for extra money to travel from Tippasandra to WindTunnel road, I never expected to face such a situation.

An year back,I was working in a tech park near Windtunnel road.Quarrelling with autowala over the extra autofare used to be a daily agenda. Tippasandra is a market place in Indiranagar area & its a one way. Most of the autodrivers refuse to use meter in that route & I usually end up paying 50 bucks just for 2KMs. 

When one autowala agreed to use meter & demanded only 10 Rs over the fare, I happily got into the auto. The weather was very cold & I was shivering due to the chill wind. Autowala started the conversation which ultimately made me feel dumb.

"Why are you shivering madam? The weather will get worse than this in forthcoming weeks."

"Worse than this??? Ufff.. I am not sure how you manage whole day outside"

"Whole day? Na. I take passengers only during early morning hours. I will go to my home by 9 -9.30 AM & resume by 7 PM night"

"How do you manage your living then?"

"I get double meter fair during these hours & that will suffice. I cannot work all day like you people"

"I have 5 lion cubs at my home & I prefer staying at home during day time"

"U have 5 children at home?"

With this question, he turned back to give a proud smile. 

"Am just 30 & I have 5 children. After my 2nd kid,I badly wanted a baby girl. But third was a boy. And my wife delivered a twin boys in fourth delivery"

Somehow I concluded that he was feeling bad for not having a baby girl & wanted to console him. But that was such a bad decision , which I realized shortly.

"You have 5 lion cubs & y do u worry"

" I'm not worried madam. I'm going to become a dad again. Father of 5 boys & 1 girl at the age of 30 itself.  Sounds great na?"

I should have kept quiet with this. No one can win fate. Me with my big mouth was no exception.. I shot that epic question.

"What if this one is also a boy"

" Then I will be father of 6 boys & 1 girl.  Whats the big deal? My wife suggested that we would stop. I made her understand that not every one can have 5 boys & 1 girl at 30."

" Madam,Have you ever seen a 30 old guy with 6 kids? "

"How old are you madam?"

"25"

By that time, I had reached my office & got down. 

"Madam, I got my first kid at 25 & by the time u reach 30, u will not get 6 kids like me".

He was feeling extremely victorious at that moment. 

Damn, why would I go for 6 kids? Well,I accepted my defeat with a silent nod.

I felt dumb for the entire day & thats how I started minding my own business.

My Weighty Issues

I know I weigh extra for my height… But it never bothered me. These oodles of weight came from my extreme love of food. There are people who are against discrimination based on gender, caste, ethnicity etc etc.. Well, I am strongly against discrimination based on cuisines. Be it North Indian, South Indian, Chinese, French, I have no partiality. I simply love them.

But I never knew that my love of food will make me look older than my age. One of the embarrassing moments of my life was the one that took place in Total Mall, Madiwala.

I was searching for a suitable Tupperware box. An old lady was also searching for a lunch Box. She slowly started the conversation.

“I’m getting this for my grandson. He is studying LKG.”  (My Mind voice:LKG Kid uses Tupperware box??? )

“He lost his box recently & this is a never ending process. The price is too much” ( Why the hell did u give Tupperware to a KG  kid)

“So.. Is this for your son? How old is he”  (Stupid lady. Not all the girls with a tummy should have a kid. )

“My son also studying LKG.” (I don’t want to be embarrassed more by saying that I’m single & there is no possibility of a kid    )

“What are u doing & what is ur husband.”

I’m working in an IT firm & my hubby also in same field. (I was speeding up the process to avoid this lady)

“Ur second son in LKG & wat about ur first kid.. Is it a boy or girl” (With this question she appeared like a real witch with a hat ,travelling in a mob… I dint answer anything.I chose a box immediately & prepared to leave.)

“Hey, I am asking you only.” ( Shut up your mouth lady. I think your fate is in my hand. ERrrrrrr)

” He is in 2nd Standard. Bye”

I left the place immediately, thinking about the ways to become slim & sexy. After several unsuccessful attemps to gym, aerobics classes , I decided to stay happily with my tummy. Yes, I have developed an attitude now -   “Its my tummy & I am the one carrying it wherever I go. If anyone is asking me to stop eating, I ll eat them too”